This year I'm praying to hear Jesus's voice better. I've been thinking about John 10, where he says "My sheep know me, they follow me because they are familiar with the sound of my voice." (paraphrased) There are a lot of reasons I follow Jesus, but I don't always feel like I'm all that clear on the sound of his voice. Sometimes, I feel like I hear God speaking out and my whole being clangs in recognition. Mostly I find myself wondering, what does Jesus say about this? Has he spoken? Did I miss it? I want to be so dearly and intimately familiar with Jesus that when he speaks, I know, just like when my husband calls on the phone and never bothers to identify himself - why would he? Sometimes, with Jesus, I feel unbalanced, like when you get a call at work from an unknown number, and they just start speaking, with familiarity but without the prefunctory "Hi this is X, I'm calling because...." and you spend the first ten or fifteen seconds trying to determine who, exactly it is on the line. I'm hoping for something better these next 40 days.
I'm also hoping for some Jesus-given clarity about my current work situation, especially when and how it needs to change. I'd say more but Arlie is awake and crying in the next room. God give me a deeper experience of you these next 40 days. Let me become empty, that you might make me full.
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